Life Plans

If you had asked me 8 or 9 years ago if I ever thought I would be a mother, working full-time, and still living in Las Vegas I would have told you that you were crazy!

When I was in high school, I had my whole life planned... I would have graduated law school by now. I would have either been working in a law firm in New York City, or in the Senate. I would have been working a minimum of 80 to 90 hours a week... single, but dating, in a meticulously clean house (thanks to a housekeeper no doubt). I would be able to afford every luxury... I thought I would be living alone, perhaps with a dog or two. I would eat at fancy restaurants every night, but still be able to keep a lean and sculpted figure. And strangely enough, this is what I thought would make me happy.

Reality:

I have not gone to law school, or even finished my bachelor's degree, as of yet (I am going back to school in the fall). I live in a town home, not quite in the lap of luxury I had foreseen. I am married, and have a daughter. I do work full-time, not in a field entirely out of the scope of my legal aspirations (but also not a place I ever thought I would be). I cannot afford the biggest and the best of anything. I cannot afford a housekeeper, and my house is FAR from meticulously clean (although I am making a bigger effort). We had two dogs, but they both had to go (chihuahuas and small children are not a good combination). I rarely eat out, certainly not at fancy restaurants. Instead I love to cook and bake, and I'm working hard on this lean and sculpted figure (although for now I would settle for a little less cushioning). How is it, that this.... so far from anything I thought I *knew* I wanted would actually be what makes me happy.

I was so ready to move away from home, to find something new. I felt no need to stay close to family... I had no desire to have children, much less ever even consider being a stay-home-mom (I would give my left leg to stay home with my daughter now). Thank goodness for my husband. Through him I have learned the importance of family, the true gift that children are. He has shown me what truly makes me happy. It's a lot less glamorous... but a lot more me.